Tuesday 4 May 2010

Feeling hot hot hot


There has been another fatal stabbing in London. While I was at work, somebody attacked my fridge-freezer with a bread knife to try and slice off bits of ice, and punctured the gas tubes in the process.

So the aged fridge is dead, the hole in the ozone layer is a few millimetres larger and the landlord is livid. On point of principle, the replacement fridge we get will not be brand new (the bed and sofa that came with the flat are older than me – the mattress is an antique). So I sign up to Freecycle, in the hope that someone wants to offload a small fridge for nothing.

After ten minutes I suddenly have 33 emails. I've never been so popular. Anna-Marie73 wants to give me a mantelpiece. A.Willis from Hanwell is giving away a toaster in ‘generally good working order’. Damien, in South Ealing, would like me to have 80-100 bags of garden stones. There are hair rollers, a deep fat fryer and a child’s booster seat up for grabs. Somebody is appealing for some old Indian shoes (chappals and jootis) for a play called ‘An Arrangement Of Old Shoes’. But there are no fridges.

Still, there is a more pressing problem at hand: like the 500g of strong cheddar that needs eating before it goes off. It's a good job I have my coffee black, or I would be seriously annoyed.

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